Christmas and Chaos

Between 44 degrees Fahrenheit and 29 degrees Fahrenheit.
Between 62nd Street on the West Side and approximately negative 15th Street on the East Side.
Between around 370 and 380 dollars.
A day in the life of a big city Christmas shopper!

The Holiday season is in full force:
The tourists are forming a line around the block outside of FAO Schwartz.
The word "SALE!" can be spotted more often than the word "HOLIDAY!"
And beware, a pack of unisex Santas (who let's hope have been drinking) are terrorizing passerbys all up and down Spring Street while shouting kind seasonal phrases such as, "You've had a Crap Year! Merry Friggin' Christmas!"

Oh the Holidays...
May we all make it home in one piece.
May we all make it home with the treasures we've just acquired.
(Not running back to your fifth sample sale to retrieve the cell phone you left in the dressing room, like yours truly.)
Hell, may we all make it home at all.

And, save me a big ol' glass of Egg Nog.
It's been a long day.
Merry Friggin' Christmas!